Build clearer, calmer conversations by practising the difference between submissive, assertive and aggressive communication. The exercise is designed for adults who want a printable CBT communication skills worksheet for setting boundaries, saying no, handling conflict and expressing needs respectfully at home, work or in close relationships.
When someone needs to say no to extra work, challenge unfair treatment, or speak up without sounding hostile, the examples in this PDF give a practical way to rehearse the words. It focuses on assertive communication, passive and aggressive responses, boundary setting, conflict management and everyday interpersonal skills.
The exercise starts by comparing three behavioural styles: submissive communication as “You Win, I Lose”, aggressive communication as “I Win, You Lose”, and assertive communication as “I Win, You Win”. It also places these styles on a simple continuum from submissive and passive through to assertive, directive and aggressive.
Practice prompts ask the user to identify submissive, aggressive and assertive responses across realistic situations. These include being asked by a boss to take on extra work, dealing with a messy partner or housemate, receiving poor food in a restaurant, being asked to lend money, and responding when decisions are made without consultation.
Adults using CBT, counselling, coaching or self-help may find it useful for preparing scripts before difficult conversations. Therapists, CBT practitioners and workplace wellbeing leads could also use it in sessions or assertiveness training groups to help people compare people-pleasing, direct communication and hostile responses. The material is credited to Think CBT.
